by Dee

Part 6

Meanwhile, Lou and Rachel were finishing up at the dress shop. Rachel suggested they go over to the main tent and show the men their new outfits. Lou felt wonderful, it was like old times, almost. Only this time she could let herself be a lady and the other difference was that she was with Jimmy and not Kid. As they walked along people who would not normally speak to her said hello. It felt nice.

Rachel was saying something.

"I'm sorry, Rachel," Lou replied, "I wasn't listening."

"I was saying that you looked very pretty you haven't changed much in the last few years."

"I haven't?"

"No, but you know the war changed a lot of folks, inside and outside. I have a friend back in Sweetwater, well, her husband had changed so much by the end of the war she didn't even recognize him when he returned."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."

"Well, it looks like we're almost there," Rachel said. But she was thinking, "At least they got the shouting over with. Lord, I hope they didn't kill each other." Rachel opened the flap of the tent and lead Lou inside. Teaspoon and Jimmy were standing in the middle of the ring talking and stopped when they saw the women arrive. Lou noticed that Jimmy had his emotions hidden from her.

Walking up to him she asked, "Jimmy, what's wrong?"

"Nothing. There's just something you need to know and it's going to come as a shock." Jimmy told her.

"What is it?" Jimmy could hear the fear creeping into her voice.

"Lou," Kid said from behind her. "I'm sorry."

Lou looked up into Jimmy's face and shook her head. "I'm imagining things again, right? If I turn around he won't be here. He's gone. Jimmy, he's gone, right?" Lou begged.

All Jimmy could do was look away. So Lou looked at Rachel and Teaspoon, the tears that had flooded her eyes, now flowing down her face. "It's not him," she stated. Rachel's tears were flowing too, and Teaspoon couldn't stand the look in Lou's eyes.

Lou looked back at Jimmy, and slowly began to turn around. "Why?" she was sobbing openly now, "Why didn't you tell me you were alive?"

"I didn't want you to see me. The burns, my leg. I didn't want your pity."

Lou looked at him, "Pity? You didn't want me to pity you. Why would I pity you? It was your choice to go to war. Your choice to leave. You…"she flew at Kid her fists flying. It took both Jimmy and Teaspoon to pull her off of Kid. "I lost my child. I left my home. How could you doubt me like that? And who wrote that godforsaken letter, Kid?"

"I didn't doubt you, it was me, and the way I was feeling. It wasn't about you." Kid replied.

"The letter, Kid? Who wrote the letter?" she demanded again, knowing in her heart that she would regret asking.

"I did." Kid said.

Lou turned around to Jimmy and reached for one of the guns he always wore. But they were missing. She turned back to Kid, "Lucky for you," she said. "I thought that you knew that I loved you for what I saw inside, not what was on the outside. I thought what we had would last forever. I thought you believed in me. In us. I see that I was wrong."

"Lou," Kid started.

"Don't," she said. "Don't ever say my name again. Maybe in time I can forgive what you did. Maybe in time I won't hate you as much as I do right now. But right now my world is gone again. You took it from me the first time when you told me you wrote me that letter. This time is worse though, you waited till I chose to let someone else into my life to come back. Well, you maybe alive but you're still a ghost to me." She never looked back as she walked out the door.

Kid started after her. "Let her go," Jimmy said in warning. They looked each other in the eye. "Don't ever go near her again. You've done enough." With that Jimmy went after Lou.

When he caught up with her he said, "Don't you think you were a little hard on him?" He knew it was the wrong thing to say the minute it came out of his mouth.

"Hard on him? No, I don't think I was. I think that I was very easy on him, considering." Lou responded.

Rachel walked up behind them as they were talking, "Lou, let's get you home and have some tea."

"I don't think tea is going to fix this Rachel."

"Drinking won't either. Now you have some decision to make young lady. Let's go. Jimmy, Teaspoon could use your help."

"Sure." Jimmy turned and walked back to the tent.

"Jimmy," Lou called, "I still love you."

Jimmy stopped in his tracks, and walked back to them. "Don't think this changes anything. I love you and I won't let you go as easily as before. He's going to have to fight to get you back." Then he kissed her hard, all the longing her felt for her in that kiss.

Turning back toward the hotel Lou and Rachel made their way to Lou's room. Lou showed Rachel in and they sat down opposite each other. "Rachel how long have you known?" Lou asked.

"Only since yesterday, when we got Cody's message saying there was trouble and ya'll needed us. Cody is the one that found Kid. I believe he was in a bad way when Cody found him." Rachel replied.

Lou nodded. She couldn't look at Rachel. "Why did he do it? Why tell me he was dead?"

"I guess he thought it would be easier than coming home and you being ashamed of him, or pitying him."

"I never would have done that," Lou replied. "I loved him."

"I know. But how do you feel now? Do you still love Kid or have you fallen in love with Jimmy?"

Lou looked at Rachel the tears overflowing her eyes. "I don't know, Rachel. I just don't know."

Rachel held out her arms and Lou collapsed against her sobbing.

Meanwhile Jimmy was having trouble of his own. "What Teaspoon?" Jimmy called as he entered the tent.

"How are you doing, son?" Teaspoon asked.

"How do you think I'm doing?" Jimmy snapped. "Totally awful. Here I was trying to be a respectable citizen, hell, even sheriff. Lou was here I had something to offer her. And now, he has to come back form the dead and mess everything up."

"He didn't come back to mess things up, son," Teaspoon consoled. "He wanted to fix things."

"He could have done that by staying away," Jimmy replied crossing his arms tight.

"No, he couldn't. Son, you know that's not how Kid thinks. You know how bad he always wants to do what's right."

"He should have thought about that before he wrote that letter to Lou."

"Son, I've known a lot of men who after bein' in battle didn't think straight. Give the Kid a chance.

"He had his chance, Teaspoon. When we were riding together he had his chance. This is my chance." Jimmy shouted as he stormed out of the tent. He started to go find Lou but decided she needed the time to think things out. So, he headed to the saloon. As he walked in he noticed a card game starting at a far table, and decided to join it.

Lou awoke a few hours later to find out she had slept the day away. Things were clearer in her mind though. As before she loved Jimmy, always would. He respected her and believed in her abilities. But the Kid was like another part of her. She never felt completely whole without him. But how could she ever explain this to Jimmy. "He'll understand," she prayed. "Lord, please let him understand."

Opposite of Lou, Kid had not been able to do anything, much less sleep. He wondered around the show starting jobs only to have someone else finish them. He just couldn't concentrate, his mind kept wondering back to Lou. He was rounding the corner of one of the tents when he saw Lou standing outside the main tent looking around. "Lou," he called to her.

She walked over to him reaching out to touch the scars on his face. Her touch was so gentle that he barely felt it. "Kid I don't know if I can ever forget what you did, but I can forgive you," she said, "for stayin' away for so long. But I've never felt complete without you. Kid, do you still love me?"

"God, Lou, I've never stopped. I've loved you from the moment I found out you were a girl. I love your smile, laugh, everything," Kid replied. "And like you said you make me complete."

Lou reached up and pulled his face down to hers. The kiss they shared was long and full of all the love they shared.

In spite of his problems Jimmy was having a good night at the poker table. He was sure the hand he was holding would be the winner. A full house, Aces high.

Buck was standing behind Jimmy and smiled down at his friend. Maybe Jimmy's luck was changing.

The man across from Jimmy smiled wickedly, "Looks like I got you beat, Sheriff." Then he laid his cards on the table. It was a high straight. The only problem was that the ace in his hand was the same as the one of the Aces in Jimmy's hand.

Jimmy looked him dead in the eye. "You have one chance, mister, to lay down the hand you were dealt," Jimmy warned in a deadly quiet tone.

"Are you sayin' I'm cheatin', Sheriff," the man drawled.

"If the shoe fits," was all Jimmy would say, as he eased his navy colt out of his holster and placed it on the table.

"Ah, sheriff, you can't blame a man for trying can you," the man mumbled.

"Yeah, I can," Jimmy replied. "Now you have till sun up to get out of my town then I'm throwin' you in jail."

Anger flared in the man's eyes. Jimmy wasn't worried though, he'd dealt with the likes of this saddle tramp before. "What ever you say, sheriff. I'll be gone by sun up. He got up and started for the front door of the saloon.

Buck turned away form Jimmy figuring everything was over and started flirting with one of the pretty barmaids.

Then a shout rang out and when Buck whirled around Jimmy was slumped over the table, shot in the back. He was still holding his cards in his hand Aces and eights, the dead man's hand.

The shot was heard among the tents of Cody's show and at the hotel. Everyone came running, Buck stepped out of the saloon as Kid and Lou came around the corner. One look at Buck's face and Lou knew. She screamed as she ran past him into the saloon. She grabbed Jimmy and started sobbing. "No, no, not you. Jimmy, please, not you."

No one had approached the other man only gave him room. "I shot Wild Bill," he crowed. As he wave his gun around, a smile slowly spread across his face.

Lou never even stopped to think. "And I shot you," she said as she picked up Jimmy's beloved colt from the table. She fired until the gun was empty. Then let it slip form her hand. She wrapped her arms around Jimmy and slid to her knees. When darkness started to slowly descend she called out, "Kid!"

Kid grabbed her before she hit the floor, "I'm here Lou."

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